Episode 4: Supporting Anxious Children Through Play and Books

Hi everyone, we are half way through the series already! I hope you have enjoyed the first three episodes to date, and we are delighted to bring this fourth episode of “Pages and Play” where Freya and I explore how bibliotherapy and play therapy can support a child by enabling them to externalize their fears through story and symbolic play, and support their nervous-system regulation and emotional literacy. 

We discuss research from Jonathan Haidt on the decline of play-based childhood and the rise of phone-based childhood, urging adults to be curious about children’s online lives. 

We also share practical guidance including validating feelings, being transparent about what to expect, and building adult and child emotional regulation tools, including sensory strategies and narrative reflection prompts. 

Our bibliotherapy client story illustrates the use of the picture book “Wemberly Worried” by Kevin Henkes to help a child label worry as a transitory visitor and practice reflective questions to navigate this worry/anxiety. 

We end this episode, like all the others, with book recommendations for children, teens, and adults on anxiety, emotional literacy, and regulation.

We hope you enjoy this episode and Pages and Play Series! And as always we’d love to hear your reflections and thoughts. 

Chapters:

00:00 Anxiety Hidden Signs

00:47 Anxious Feelings Explained

03:18 Books And Play Heal

05:21 Play Therapy Benefits

07:17 Why Anxiety Rising

11:04 Support At Home

14:39 Wemberly Worried Story

20:48 Transparency Builds Safety

24:09 Adult Nervous System Check

28:25 Rewrite Your Inner Story

33:32 Book Picks For Anxiety

41:54 Closing Thoughts

Book Recommendations:

• The Whole-Brain Child by Daniel J. Siegel & Tina Payne Bryson
• Raising An Emotionally Intelligent Child by John Gottman
• Anxious Kids, Anxious Parents by Reid Wilson & Lynn Lyons
• Nurturing Natures by Graham Music
• Ruby’s Worries by Tom Percival
• The Huge Bag of Worries by Virginia Ironside
• The Invisible String by Patrica Karst
• The Boy Who Made Everyone Laugh by Helen Rutter
• The Worry (Less) Book: Feel Strong, Find Calm, and Tame Your Anxiety! By Rachel Brian 
• The Final Year and The First Year by Matt Goodfellow
• First, We Make the Beast Beautiful by Sarah Wilson
• The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt
• Wemberley Worried by Kevin Henkes
• The Girl Who Thought in Pictures (Young Aspiring) By Julia Finley Mosca
• The Lion Inside by Rachel Bright and Jim Field
• The Art Cure by Daisy Fancourt
• What to do when you worry too much by Dawn Huebner
• The Anxiety Workbook for Kids by Robin Alter & Crystal Clarke
• Breathe like a Bear by Kira Willey
• Feelings by Aliki

Transcript

SPEAKER_00 1:05

Welcome back to Pages and Play, The Power of Bibliotherapy and Play Therapy on Young Minds. On today's episode, we're diving into a worry that shows up time and time again in both bibliotherapy and playtherapy spaces. Anxiety in children rarely announces itself clearly. It doesn't always say, I'm worried. Instead, it whispers through tummy aches before school. It hides in perfectionism. It bursts out in meltdowns over seemingly small things. It clings at drop-off time. It avoids birthday parties. It keeps young minds awake at night with big looping thoughts. I don't know if you'd like to start, Freya.

SPEAKER_01 1:53

Yeah, I thought I'd start with the difference between feeling anxious and anxiety disorder. So this episode focuses on feeling anxious, not anxiety disorder, but the information can be used for both. Feeling anxious is a natural response to stress, often characterized by feelings of tension and worry and physical changes in the body, such as increased heartbeat and tense muscles. Feeling anxious is a common natural response to stressful situations. It's actually there to help us. While anxiety disorders involve excessive worries that can interfere with our daily functioning. Therefore, if anxiety becomes overwhelming or persistent, it may indicate an anxiety disorder, and that requires professional help. So you should consider at this point consulting with a mental health professional. Anxiety or feeling anxious involves complex nervous system interactions and can manifest in both mental and physical ways, like I said, through worry, arousal, and the symptoms such as tense muscles, which might look like the tummy aches before school, or feeling sick, rapid heartbeats. Prolonged anxiety can impact our overall health. Therefore, understanding its neuro basis helps explain those kind of physical and emotional responses.

SPEAKER_00 3:20

So in the therapy room, anxiety often arrives disguised as something else. It could be anger, it could be withdrawal, control, or even silence. Today we'll be exploring what anxiety actually looks like in children and why it's so often misunderstood. How stories can gently externalize this fear and help children feel less alone, and how play creates a safe distance from overwhelming feelings. And of course, why metaphor, imagination, and symbolic play are powerful tools for calming the nervous system. We'll also cover practical ways that parents, educators, and practitioners can support anxious young minds, as well as include book recommendations on navigating anxiety for your child and for parents, teachers and carers too. So in bibliotherapy, books essentially become bridges. A character who's afraid of the dark or worried about school or frightened of making mistakes allows a child to say, that's me. Without the pressure of speaking directly about themselves, they can explore their fears through someone else's story. Story offers them the language, it offers them hope, it offers them endings where things shift. It gives them a sense of closure, but it also gives them different ways of solving or approaching a certain issue. So it's just a wonderful way of helping your child navigate through that anxiety or through those difficult fears. And in play, for I hope this resonates, anxiety can show up symbolically, either through a tiny figure hiding from a large dinosaur, or through a doll who can't leave the house, or a superhero who needs endless protection. So through play, children rehearse bravery. They experiment with control, they retell scary experiences in ways that gives them mastery. So both approaches share something powerful. They respect the child's pace, they don't force insight, they don't tell them how to solve the problem, they let them come up with their own solution and they create a sense of safety, which is first and foremost the most important. So whether you're a parent noticing new worries or anxieties, or a teacher supporting anxious pupils, or a practitioner holding space for big feelings, this episode is for you. So let's begin and explore how bibliotherapy and play therapy gently help children navigate anxiety, build self-awareness and self-understanding, as well as resilience and connection, the most important piece of it all in children.

SPEAKER_01 6:26

Thank you, Vigil. As you mentioned, children can play out some of their anxieties through metaphor and imagination and symbolic play. But there are other ways that play therapy supports these children. And I absolutely loved your thing about looking at both approaches, sharing something powerful in terms of respecting the child's pace and not forcing that insight, but first creating that safety to begin with. So, yeah, engaging in the play, the child is able to communicate that inner world, often revealing emotions that may be difficult for them to articulate in words alone. And this process allows them to safely explore their fears and build on their development of their own healthy coping mechanisms and grant a sense of control, as you talked about that mastery, over the anxious thoughts and emotions. The act of play also teaches children how to regulate their nervous system, which is so vital for them as they develop and become adults in this world, and how to manage those overwhelming feelings, which again, like I said, is essential for enhancing their overall mental health and well-being. There are other ways as well. So, as we talked a little bit before in the episode on emotional literacy, it helps children to identify a name and manage some of those emotions. But it can hide very much, as you said at the beginning, before in that, hiding imperfectionism. So children can gain a sense of control through perfectionism. And so play allows them to build a tolerance to the mess of life and their challenges in a safe environment for them to be able to manage. And as you said, that the therapeutic relationship is the most important thing. It helps children to feel understood, it helps them to feel that they are being heard, that they are being cared for, and that all supports them and reduces those feelings of isolation. So in Jonathan Heights' Anxious Generation, he talks about his research in the increasing statistics of anxiety and depression in the mental health of young people. And he talks about the first trend, which was the decline in play-based childhood, starting in the late 1980s and then accelerating in the 90s. And he really explains that all mammals need free play. That is a fundamental part of healthy development. But at this point in the late 1980s, in the beginning of the 90s, parents started limiting unsupervised outdoor play due to rising anxiousness about unsafe situations of them being outside and unsupervised. And this shift resulted in that generation of children and subsequent children missing out most vital experiences of risk assessment, friendship building, and independence. And he then explains that this was further compounded by the second trend, which was the rise of phone-based childhood. And so we had adolescents switching to smartphones with social media access. Now, many adults are unaware of the impact of this virtual environment and the addictive design of these technical platforms that these children are daily and for good periods of time engaging with. This is something that we need to address. We need to start being really curious about our children's online lives. We would not drop our eight-year-old child in the middle of London or Tokyo or the big city and expect them to navigate this without supervision. But we would give them a phone and we have no knowledge of where they are going, who is online with them, and what they're being exposed to.

SPEAKER_00 10:22

I think this decline in childhood play is so vital and so key to the fundamental development of children that I think it deserves an episode in itself. And I think it would be really helpful just to hone in on some of those principles and ideas a little bit more. And as you mentioned, how the internet is going to be shaping a lot of this.

SPEAKER_01 10:47

Yeah, so much of our child's playtime is now online. And so this is an area that we really need to be curious about.

SPEAKER_00 10:55

Be curious about perhaps how we can bring in the internet and the online spaces into the play and reading spaces and how we can leverage off it rather than seeing it completely as an a negative tool, because I think we we are going to have to live with this technology. So I think that might be a really helpful episode for parents. But if you do think it's helpful, please do let us know. And that will encourage us to put together an episode, especially for this.

SPEAKER_01 11:24

If there are things you would like us to discuss together, there's topics that are important to you, please do email us and let us know if there's other things you would like us to have future episodes on. We welcome that.

SPEAKER_00 11:38

Yes, exactly. This would definitely inform the next season. So it would be wonderful if there was anything you'd like us to cover that we haven't covered so far that we won't be covering in future episodes. So please do write to us and uh we always write back at vigil at booktherapy.io or at Freya's contact details.

SPEAKER_01 11:57

So Freya at plainrefuge.co.uk.

SPEAKER_00 12:00

Um don't worry about looking them up or writing them down right now. You can just refer to the show notes at the end.

SPEAKER_01 12:09

Brilliant. So there are many ways that you can support your child at home. Sometimes going straight to positive affirmations for some children, that can feel very big and that can be quite difficult if you have low self-esteem. So it's vital that when we're playing and reading with our child, that we're helping them to feel seen, heard, and safe to express their true feelings, as we talked about before. So instead of dismissing a child's emotions, so for example, saying, Don't be sad, we need to acknowledge it. So I see that you're feeling sad right now. That's okay.

SPEAKER_00 12:47

I think that's the hardest thing to do, isn't it? And sometimes it is really the simplicity of I will hold your pain for you and I will stay with you no matter how negative you feel, and I will not leave your site. Because, like you said, often when we don't validate or acknowledge children's feelings, there's almost a sense of abandonment. Child can feel it or they're alone, and it just almost brings up a sense of disconnection. I know I can be guilty of that, and it's about practice.

SPEAKER_01 13:17

It's really tricky, like you said. And as a parent, we naturally want to problem solve, or we naturally want to reassure them, but by proxy, reassure ourselves, or we want to dismiss it because that's quite a scary place for us to go. And so there can be a whole host of reasons why that's really tricky for us to do. But like you were saying, if we are dismissing those more challenging emotions for them, then those emotions don't get validated, and that part of them can go into a shutdown that can feel like it's something that should stay hidden. And we obviously don't want that. We want them to know that all parts of them, all parts of their emotions, we hear and we understand and and we love that we're going to accept.

SPEAKER_00 14:10

Yes, such such an important point.

SPEAKER_01 14:13

But I do agree it's a really tricky one to get the language, be able to do that with your own child. It's much easier as a therapist than it is as a parent to have to admit. So let your child know that it's safe to talk about any feelings. A child needs to be heard, like you said. And like I said, we so often go into the problem-solving part. And sometimes a child isn't able to access that part of the brain, that the cognitive logical part of the brain, at that point when they are highly in the emotional, amidular part of their brain to and limbic part of their brain to be able to access that. So we need to make sure that they feel safe and heard and that they have your undivided attention, and then you can talk about solutions. And that will really depend on your child and their processing time with that. So the language that is an intentional and focus on building the child's self-esteem and sense of worth. And this is really praising or encouraging the process instead of praising the achievements or the products. So things like I love spending time with you. I'm proud of you for trying your best. Your ideas matter. It's okay to make mistakes. That's how we learn. You're brave for sharing how you feel. I love that you care about others. You can always talk to me about anything. And I trust you to make good decisions or good choices. Rachel, do you have any stories of bibliotherapy in action and how books serve as bridges? I love that metaphor.

SPEAKER_00 15:52

Yes, I do have a few, but I just wanted to say firstly, thank you for sharing those tips. They're so helpful. And it really sets out your whole approach to play therapy, which is, I feel really helpful for our listeners. So thank you so much. And I'm certainly going to be sharing or writing down those tips on a post-it note so that I can remember to use them intentionally with my children. I really feel like it's key that they do hear these words. And of course, I'd love to share my experience of a young girl called Aria who struggled with anxiety and how a book called Wembley Worried by Kevin Hanks really helped her navigate this. This is a gentle story about a mouse named Wembley who worries about everything: big things, small things, and everything in between. And Aria immediately connected with Wembley. She said, Wembley asks a lot of questions like me. And that observation was important because in bibliotherapy, the process often begins with recognition, the shock of recognition, as I call it, that sense of connection with the character. We know that when she reads about Wembley in the story, she immediately identifies with her. She recognizes Wembley's fears are similar to hers, for example, losing her toys or being late or starting school or entering a new situation. And I noticed that Aria was nodding every time we spoke about this part of the story and about Wembley's questions that she was asking in the script. She also mentioned that she felt she needed to check things over and over again because it made the worry feel a bit lighter, it made the worry go away a little bit. We talked about how we all need reassurance, and especially if we're struggling with anxiety, this can definitely make us feel unsafe. So just by talking about it, we were essentially able to externalize the worry. This is the second part of the process, which is separating the emotion from the child. So we introduced the idea that Arya was not a worry child, that was not her character. Instead, we said to her that sometimes you carry with you what we call the questioning worry. And this label essentially was inspired by Wembley's behavior in the story. So whenever Aria felt anxious, she would then say and practice saying, the questioning worry is visiting today. And literally, this small linguistic shift, the small bit of language that we used, created this emotional distance that Aria needed from her worry. And the worry then becomes an experience and not an identity, not part of who she is. So this is a very important piece of the externalization problem. So once we've done that, that then opens up the space for further discussion where we reflect and we build up a therapeutic insight. And going back to the story, one of the most therapeutic aspects of the story is that Wembley essentially goes to school, she makes a friend, and eventually discovers that the world's not as frightening as she expected. And at that point, Arya notices something very important. That even though Wembley was still worried, she still went, she still faced her fears. And this became a core message that courage was not defined as feeling the fear, but as staying with the fear and moving forward and continuing our everyday activities. So this reflection and insight for Aria was really helpful. She felt like while she could also do that, she could hold her fears and still go into school and be okay. So we invited Aria to imagine a new page at the end of the book, a new scenario, essentially, where she drew Wembley sitting beside another mouse at school. And she mentioned that her worry could walk beside her and not in front of her. So this was an insight that we'd built together. And this message was really important for her to take away and give her the courage that she needed to move forward and face her daily school activities. So whenever she felt anxious, we praised three reflexive questions, which is what is my worry asking me to be careful about? Do I need help, reassurance, or time? And what small step can I take to manage this worry alongside feeling it too? So facing the fear and doing what I need to do anyway. And so this gave her a sense of agency, just doing these three things. She shifted from what was what I call avoidant behavior and not being able to face that fear, not being able to move forward and not be paralyzed by that emotion. And just practice facing the fear, practice doing these things. And this led to her shifting away from that worry and discovering that okay, so I'm feeling a bit anxious, but I can do this. And worry is just a little visitor who sits by my side as I'm going about my daily chores. Stories like Wembley Worried remind us that children don't always need bravery to be perfect, they don't always need to feel brave or courageous in order to do something. They have the permission to be a little worried. So I thought it was a wonderful story, especially for four to eight-year-olds in navigating anxiety. So definitely pick this one up if your child is struggling with anxiety.

SPEAKER_01 21:41

Thank you, Rachel. No, I love how books give us that permission and like you were saying, remind a child that they don't always have to be the bravest person. Absolutely. And one of the things I wanted to also touch upon is that transparency is essential for children who are anxious because it helps them to feel safe, secure, and respected in those relationships, especially with adults that they trust, like their parents, their teachers and therapists, and building that relationship. So anxiety often comes when we're not knowing what to expect. And when an adult is open and honest about what is happening, what will happen next, this can help to reduce that child's fear of the unknown. And when we're transparent, children learn that they can rely on you to tell the truth and not to hide things from them. And this trust is foundational in supportive relationships where the child feels secure enough to be able to express themselves and work through the anxiety. And this goes for all adults. So whether you're a parent, you're a teacher, you're a therapist, all of those things, that transparency is key.

SPEAKER_00 22:54

Yes, and just to add to that, Freya, from a bibliotherapy perspective, transparency is also about language and narrative. So when we read stories with children, we are modelling that. Openness about feelings. A character might say, I feel scared about starting school, or I'm worried I won't make friends. And that explicit naming of emotion shows children that feelings are not secrets to be hidden, they're experiences to be understood. And books create a safe third space. So instead of saying you seem anxious, you can sometimes often feel exposing. We might say, I wonder if this character feels a bit like you do sometimes. Essentially, it's an indirect form of transparency, but it allows the child to approach their feelings without the shame or the sense of shame that they may experience or self-imposed. Bibliotherapy supports what we call that narrative transparency. And in many well-chosen children's books, anxiety doesn't magically disappear. Instead, the character learns something, they seek help, they try again, they discover that they can cope, that they'll be okay. And that realistic progression teaches children that anxiety is not a flaw, it's not a mistake, it's not something to be ashamed about. It's a part of being human, it's part of our repertoire of emotions. And that we can work through it, we can get through it, we can navigate it. When adults are transparent and when stories are emotionally honest, children internalize a powerful message that we can recognize our feelings and feelings are separate to us, and we can then label and name them, and we can ask questions, and nothing important is being hidden from me because we talk about all these emotions all the time. And I am absolutely allowed to talk about what's going on inside me. It is a safe space. So this clarity and honesty, both through connection and relating with each other, but also through the narrative, through the story, are what helps build a relationship with the child where the child feels secure enough to express themselves and begin working through the anxiety or any other emotion that they might be going through.

SPEAKER_01 25:14

And Ridgewell, I was just thinking, well, because I'm going back to talk about a play prompt, something for you guys to do at home. And this one is for the adults, but I actually just wanted to go back to something you said. So at the beginning, you said feelings are not secrets to be hidden, they are experiences to be understood. And I just loved that. I wanted to reset that in light of what I'm going to say for the play prompt. So I would really suggest looking at your own nervous system. So this is something that we adults sometimes are just so busy that we don't have time to look at this. So think about what makes you tense and what oozes and calms you at different points in different situations. Or it might be that sometimes you go flat. So what things help you to feel energized, what things help you to bring back that energy, looking at all those things. So, as I said at the beginning, feeling anxious involves a complex nervous system interaction and having an understanding of this neuro basis helps affect these physical and emotional responses and help us find coping strategies. So, for example, going for a walk may be your go-to calming activity. But it isn't always helpful or suitable. So, for example, you are feeling very tense, you have just driven for the last half an hour, and you've got to the outskirts of the city where you work, and suddenly you've hit a massive traffic jam, okay? And you are late for your morning meeting at nine o'clock, but you're stuck. Going for a walk is not going to help you in this moment, quite the opposite. But some acknowledgement. So you know that you're feeling anxious and this is going to affect your driving, which means you respond and address your tension by doing other things. It might be that you open the window, you turn on the radio if music helps to calm you, and that fresh air coming in from the window feels really nice against your face. And you're able to think in this moment, actually, what are the key points I need to address of that meeting? But I've got to be there first thing. And can I have those ready so that I know that when I do get to the meeting, I can go straight in and I'm being concise and I'm getting to the core of what I need to give in that meeting. And this is why it's important that we have a range of activities that help us. We need to understand our emotions, as were previously mentioned. So I encourage you to think not only about your five senses, but also think about other sensory systems. So start with you and then look at your children and see what things help them. So does your child's vestibulary system, so that's the sensory system that has a crucial role in maintaining balance and spatial orientation, so that your child finds it calming or invigorating, jumping on a trampoline or going for a bike ride after school. Or is it that they're looking for preception support, which means that they're looking for big hugs at some point, or the feel of a rough surface, or that we like to push and pull things. I was reading the Art Cure after hearing a podcast Vidal did with Daisy Foncourt. So I was thinking about music and art and writing and dance, and sometimes dancing and yoga is what you need. And sometimes you need to sit and watch the rainfall, and sometimes you need a friend, and sometimes you need to be alone. These are all part of understanding your own emotions and what supports your nervous system. So I really encourage you to listen to your body, and then you can start to look at this with your child.

SPEAKER_00 29:11

Oh, this is so helpful, Freya. I think this is such an important idea and piece that we often overlook, we just often ignore, we go straight to the child. And so really glad that you've shed some light on it today. And I think that bit about listening to what your body might need, that is absolutely essential. And because this is a bibliotherapy podcast as well, I'd love to extend on this by offering a bibliotherapy prompt to sit alongside this play prompt because just as our bodies need regulation, our minds often need reflection, and we often will have thoughts coming into our heads. So I would like to just offer an invitation, a bibliotherapy invitation, which is essentially asking yourself, what story am I living in this moment? And is it helping me? Is it serving me? So, for example, when you're sitting in the traffic jam or when you're running late or your heart's facing, there's usually a narrative playing in your mind. Am I going to mess this up? They'll think I'm unprofessional, I'm already so behind. So here's the prompt. So this is a reflection prompt. Think about the books that have comforted you in the past. What characters model regulation, courage, or steadiness? What if these people, whether it's a real life person in a memoir or a fictional character, what have they done that sort of embodies that sense of courageousness or stability or empowerment? And if I stepped into their shoes for a moment, what would shift inside of me? So just like having these ranges of sensory tools that Freya offered, it's powerful to have this range of narrative tools. And whether it's music or movement or stillness, I'd essentially want you to add rewriting to those activities so that we can use essentially what I call narrative therapy to re-author your story or rewrite your story. Because bibliotherapy is not just about reading books, but it's also about using writing and creativity to heal, to be empowered, and to move past those sometimes really negative emotions that take hold and almost hold us hostage. Really pick up a pen alongside some of these other activities and reflect and think about if this was a moment from a book or a scene from a book, what would I call it? What would the title be? And what type of a person am I being right now? So externalize this identity almost. Am I being a catastrophizer? Am I being a perfectionist? Am I being the overwhelmed hero? And then what would the compassionate narrator say to me in this scene? So it's essentially what we call theory of mind, but perspective taking, changing the way you're looking at yourself because just that little shift gives you some distance from yourself, gives you some space, allows you to reframe. It's such a beautiful use of empathy on yourself, a lovely act. It's that switching from self-empathy to third-party empathy and then bringing it back to yourself. And it's a really strong way of shifting those emotions that are sitting inside there, almost melting those emotions away to some degree. You know, really invite you to reflect on these points and also how the next chapter might look. With positive visualization, we always think about how we would want things to look if they were all going to work out. But this is essentially just reauthoring that piece of the story and giving you a sense of closure and a way of moving forward. And that's very much a core foundation or principle of narrative therapy, which I use extensively in my work, and I also devote a whole chapter to that in my book, Bibliotherapy, The Healing Power Reading. So if you want more uh guidance on using it, do refer to that. But when we pause and we also we're introducing flexibility in our thinking, we're choosing a more helpful story that will empower us because we're always thinking about the impact of our thoughts in our heads. Feelings such as anxiety or sadness often sometimes trigger negative thoughts, but they aren't serving us, so we have to think about their impact. Reauthor that whole script in your head, listen to your body, notice that story that you're telling yourself and see if you can put a positive spin to it. And remember that regulation is not about eliminating anxiety or fear, it's really about having a range of tools or responses or reactions, both sensory and narrative, that allow you to safely transition from those moments of anxiety to a moment of feeling more empowered. And what's great is that once you start to notice these stories, the nervous system shifts and you'll notice some bodily shifts in yourself. And you'll be able to then also recognize that process in your child. And you might be able to say to them, is your body feeling a sensation right now, a sensation of anxiety? Is it feeling a bit fuzzy or a bit jittery? And what's your brain telling you? And this opens an invitation to reflect, to discuss, to have a conversation that will hopefully bring about a positive shift. And with that said, Freya, I'm conscious that we're coming to the end of our episode. So, as always, before we go, we like to share some reading recommendations for our audience for both children and parents and carers, including teachers. Freya, what would you like to suggest? You always have some great book recommendations. I'd love to hear some of yours.

SPEAKER_01 34:53

Oh, thank you. So, Ruby's Worries, a giant bag of worries and invisible string. And like I said before, the invisible string comes in lots of different formats. So I'd definitely go for that one. Um that really does look at that deparation anxiety. Looking a bit older, I love The Boy Who Made Everyone Laugh. It talks about a boy with a speech disorder and it's just incredibly funny and lovely. So I would really recommend that one. There's another book called The Worry Less Book: Feel Strong, Find Calm, and Tame Your Anxiety. And this book, it really explains to the child what is happening in the body. So the emotional distance from anxiety that it's not your identity but an experience instead. There's other books in terms of teenage books. I would say the final year and the first year, where Matt Goodfellow looks at a young carer and the big emotions going on with the primary school and the first year at secondary school, as well as him dealing with a lot of challenges at home. They're brilliant books, absolutely brilliant. The parents, a go-to book that I am always suggesting is First Make the Beast Beautiful. Really like that one. It's a gorgeous memoirs, isn't it? It's got a really lovely balance to it in terms of you feel like you're on the journey. She talks about her anxiety when she was very young and then all the way through her adult life and her professional life. And she intermixes it with different kinds of research. She's a very good researcher, and she's showing you some examples and techniques that she's used. So as a parent, you can think actually that might be suitable for my child now, or that might be something I can talk about with them in 10 years' time if this is still something that they're having challenges with. So I think it's a great book. And then obviously I mentioned the anxious generation as well. But please, Vigil, tell me about the books that you would recommend as well.

SPEAKER_00 36:53

Yes, so I loved all of those. Thank you so much. And and just to add, Jonathan Hage and Catherine Price have just published a new book called The Amazing Generation. And that one actually teaches children how to get off their phones and their screens and become really adventurous in the real world and start to explore the real world. So I think it's wonderful that they've actually now written a really practical book about how to live a completely smartphone-free childhood, which I think is actually an essential read. So I'd love to suggest that. So you can choose what fits your child best. But if you're a parent or a teacher or a therapist, I'd love for you to explore these titles with the children in your life, not just for reading purposes, but also as conversation starters and invite them to reflect on questions like what part of the story did you like the best? What characters did you think were brave? You know, how could you change or how could this character shift from those feelings of anxiety to feeling more empowered, or just be able to sit with those feelings of anxiety and still navigate the world? So for fiction, I have Wumbly World by Kevin Hanks, which I mentioned early on in the story, the permission to feel anxious, but also still get through life and daily activities. It's also a very hopeful book. And then, of course, The Lion Inside by Rachel Bright and Jim Feld. This is a lovely tale about finding courage even when you don't feel as fierce or brave as you wish you were. And there's some really lovely, playful animal characters that help you explore confidence and self-belief. And then, of course, I have something called The Girl Who Thought in Pictures by Julia Finlay Mosco. And this one is special because it also celebrates neurodiversity and creativity and the joy of thinking differently. So it's a reminder that not all minds look the same, they don't experience things in the same way, and that's a wonderful thing. So it's not directly an anxiety book, but it's a wonderful book to read in parallel with the other books. And then, of course, with nonfiction, I have What to Do When You Worry Too Much by Don Hubner. And this is a child-friendly guide to anxiety. It's it offers practical tools such as breathing exercises and how to approach problem solving. It also offers the toolkit that your child can take away and apply in everyday life. And then, of course, you've got the anxiety workbook. So this is very much in a workbook format. And again, it's got activities and exercises and spaces for kids to draw and write about their worries. And then we've got Breathe Like a Bear by Kira Wiley, which again is a lovely book filled with breathing exercises that are quite fun and quite good for encouraging mindfulness or just sitting with your worries for a moment and just breathing in. And it's a great way to get your child to calm down and calm their bodies. I had one more for children, which is Feelings by Aliki. And this is a beautifully illustrated book that introduces children to a wild range of emotions from joy to fear to disappointment with really simple explanations of each emotion that children can easily relate to. I hope that's helpful for the children. For the parents and teachers, a general book on emotional regulation and emotional intelligence is probably very useful. I've got The Whole Brained Child by Daniel Siegel and Tina Broyson, and this one's a modern classic, very popular. I'm sure some of you have already read it, but it essentially breaks down what's happening in a developing brain and offers very easy to understand language and practical strategies for helping children regulate those really big emotions, such as anxiety and fear, and sadness. The book called Anxious Kids, Anxious Parents by Rude Wilson and Lynn Lyons, and it specifically tackles anxiety in parents and explores family anxiety and how it can often be inherited between the generations.

SPEAKER_01 41:09

I would like to also recommend Graham Music's wonderful book, too, Nurturing Nature. They cannot be erased, but new brain pathways can be built with new experiences. And play and reading can create new experiences and worlds for us and offer a safe haven for us to grow and make sense of the world, even when life feels overwhelming.

SPEAKER_00 41:44

And that's such an important lesson, Freya, because we often forget to play. We get so boiled down in work. And I feel like play and reading are such vital parts of who we are as human beings and that being part.

SPEAKER_01 41:58

I'm wondering, like Jonathan Heid was talking about play-based childhood, maybe even a bit of play-based adulthood might be helpful as well.

SPEAKER_00 42:06

We just need more play. I think that could be like the last play prompt, right? Play with your children, make sure you create that time for leisure and reading and all these things that bring us joy, which we can often forget in the craziness of life.

SPEAKER_01 42:21

Yeah, yeah. Have that joy, have that connection.

SPEAKER_00 42:25

Exactly. I hope you enjoyed this episode of Pages and Play, the Power Bibliotherapy and Play Therapy on Young Minds. And if you'd like to catch up on previous episodes, you can do so wherever you get podcasts. Simply search for Pages and Play, the Power Bibliotherapy and Play Therapy on Young Minds. And until next time, take care and happy playing and reading.